Normally I would whine, but today I'm super grateful for my buddy Luke, the handy dandy walker. Without him I couldn't get out of bed, or do much of anything. I had a neurology appointment today, and with Omar driving and Luke in the back seat, I felt invincible. It was so nice to get out, enjoy the scenery on the freeway, interact with the general public, and just feel normal.
We didn't do much other than go to the doctor and grab some lunch, but it was awesome.
This whole episode taught me a whole heck of humility and gratitude. I wasn't happy when I couldn't lift heavier weights. I can barely lift 3lbs.
I wasn't happy when I couldn't run. I can't walk unassisted.
I wasn't happy when I wasn't turning out blog posts like crazy. I'm glad to be coherent enough today to do so.
I'm done with disappointment in what I have. I am done with wanting more without putting in the work. Eff lupus, eff vasculitis, and all the other stuff I have. Because I'm grateful. I'm learning.
And I will stronger than ever.
Watch out now.
We named my grandma's walker "Max"... it was her boyfriend and offered her support when she needed it and gave her freedom to do her own thing.
ReplyDeleteIt's a brave person to admit they're still in the learning process. Thank you for the reminder to be thankful for what I have!! I certainly needed it today. Good luck and keep on keeping on!! =D