Monday blahs

I was super excited to have today off, especially once I realized that no one in my immediate circle had the time off. It was going to be a little slice of time out of reality! I was going to catch up on chores, blog, go to the farmers market, get all sorts of seasonal veggies, cook an absolutely amazing lunch and dinner and so much more.

But in true fashion, I was up at 3am, couldn't fall back asleep until 6am, and slept until about 15 minutes ago. The neighborhood farmers market is now closed, I have absolutely no energy and the husband is working from home. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy the company but it sort of cramped my vision of having the empty apartment and running around like a madwoman and blasting all of my favorite music, which I can't do if he's on the phone.

Over the weekend I had an epiphany moment which sparked the desire for the day alone. I realized that my hobbies, while entertaining, were fairly isolating. I love to read and watch movies. Great for expanding the mind, but not great if you are trying to also enhance and develop friendships. I started thinking about the things that I love was trying to figure out if I could make it into a hobby. I'm really enjoying blogging, reading other people's blogs, tweeting and getting into the whole social media thing - it's fun, and easy to do even when I can't get out of bed. I've also loved reading recipes and am dying to try out so many of them. Up until 6 months ago I considered myself culinarily-challenged and my husband did/does most of the cooking, so this is a huge step for me. And I love yoga.

In a moment of insanity/clarity I turned to my husband and asked him, "would it be weird if I decided to make finding yummy healthy recipes and making them for us a hobby?"

Needless to say he looked at me like I was insane and said, "Hon, cooking IS a hobby for a lot of folks."

I realized that when you have a tenuous relationship with food - love to eat, hate loving to eat, battling weight issues - deciding to make cooking a hobby come with a mixed bag of emotions. Will I be able to handle making delicious food on a regular basis without gorging and getting fat? Can I make food other people will want to eat? Will I always struggle with these emotions tied to food? Ugh. Why can't something like choosing a hobby be just a tad bit simpler?

Yoga and meditation are easy - I already have a membership at a great studio. I just need to get my body cooperating again and then I'll be back there. In the meantime, I'll stick to bed yoga and my #yogaAday challenge. Here's today's pose, by the way.



I'd really like one morning where I'm not plagued with all this heavy thought about food and weight. Just one.


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